The one about resolutions

I don’t believe in new year’s resolutions.

They seem like something that we “should” do, because everyone else is doing it too. But by February, our resolutions are thrown out the window.

A few years ago, I decided to change things up.

Instead of making resolutions in January, why not make them in September?

This just made a lot more sense to me.

September signifies the start of a new year. School starts in September, hockey starts in September and fall starts in September. And if you write your resolutions in September, you get a four-month head start.

Last year, my resolution was to “figure out fear”.

Why? I realized that I was actually holding myself back from pursuing new ideas and trying new things because of fear.

What if someone doesn’t like the idea?

What would people say?

How can I even find the time?

I must admit that the first few months of “figuring out fear” was a painfully slow process. At times, I felt like I was going backwards.

Instead of taking action, I would freeze up and think of ways to procrastinate. I started to question why I came up with such an incredibly vague resolution in the first place.

Little did I know that the turning point would happen in January.

  1. I joined a weekly Sunday morning mastermind with two friends, Bruce and Tim, where we would recap our week and the lessons learned during the past week. We are now on Week 35 and still going strong.
  2. I re-started Beyond the A where we offer interview coaching for law students and workshops to empower lawyers to thrive in their careers. We’ve since worked with over 100+ students who were able to secure summer positions (and many have landed multiple offers).
  3. I started listening to my inner voice and re-joined Toastmasters. This led me to compete in the 2021 International Toastmasters Speech Competition where I was the runner-up in my area.

And the months went on, I started to get a much better handle on fear.

In April, I faced an anti-Asian hate incident where two Caucasian men called me a “f***ing chink” and threw garbage at me. When I tried to report the incident to the police, I waited on the phone for over 30 minutes (no one picked up) and the only reporting forms available online were in Chinese.

This became another opportunity to figure out fear and led to a movement called Fix Police Reporting. Because of this advocacy, the Vancouver Police Department has since fixed its reporting system, and there are now hate crime reporting forms in over 14 languages.

Last month, I had an idea for a project to help dads (and dads-to-be) on their journey to parenthood — 2 Dads 1 Car. This idea came about after an insightful discussion with a friend on a road trip.

I realized that there is little material out there for dads. They seemed outdated and do not fully capture what modern fatherhood looked like.

Fear would have held me back from taking action. But this time, it didn’t. Within the span of two weeks, we finished filming all 10 episodes for Season 1, landed our first sponsor and launched the show on YouTube, Apple and Spotify.

This has been quite the year of “figuring out fear”.

Fear will always be there by my side whether I like it or not.

But I think that I finally figured you out.

If you’re curious to explore this idea in further detail, check out our upcoming Living Room Series session on “New Chapters” on Sunday, Sept 19.



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